Tag Archives: training
Coaching & Training: Accountability versus Babysitting
Years ago, I had a client who was furious at me –claiming that I didn’t hold her “accountable” and didn’t make sure she took the action steps she was supposed to take. Even back then, I didn’t stand for her attitude –and, basically, we ended up “firing” each other. But, it didn’t feel good at all and I still think about that experience…
Today, I have a very different understanding about what it means to hold our clients accountable. There is a big difference between that and serving as some sort of taskmaster or babysitter. As ICF coaches, we view our clients as “whole, creative and resourceful”. To treat them like children by insistently asking, “Did you do this as you said you would?” is a mistake. Instead, we must simply ask our clients what support, if any, they might need, as well as gently check in – when appropriate – with, “So, how is that coming along?”
I don’t think that our clients are looking for another parent or a babysitter. And, I suspect, the clients who do, may need therapy more than coaching. So, whenever a new coaching prospect starts drilling me on how good I am at holding my clients accountable, a red flag is immediately raised in my mind. That’s just my 2 cents.
NLP, Coaching & Training: Getting Ourselves in an Optimum State
What is an “optimum state”? It’s a state of mind that you are in when you are “in the flow” or “in the zone”; a state of mind you find yourself in, when you accomplish things in an effortless way, and it feels as if “it was meant to be”. The question is, can we get there by will, consciously placing ourselves in that “winning” state of mind?
If we could do that, we could go for any interview, participate in any debate, take on any challenge without later on thinking back about what we could have said or done, because we would have said and done the exact “right” things in the moment when the opportunity presented itself right there and then. There would be no regrets, only the wins. We would be able to demonstrate our abilities and skills in the best possible light; we would be able to be extremely productive and more valuable. So, can we do that by will and if so, how?
One of the ways of doing it, is with NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) technique.
1. Access the feeling associated with that state of mind
2. Intensify it as much as you can (by imagining all the details of one of the events that had caused you to feel this way in the past)
3. Let go of the event and just keep focusing on the feeling allowing yourself to experience it fully and powerfully.
4. Anchor it by placing your hand on one of your knees, or on your chest, or by putting your thumb and forefinger together – whichever feels more natural to you
5. Whenever you want to get yourself in that state of mind, just doing #4 should be able to do the trick. If it’s not working, you must choose a different trigger, meaning, a different event that would create a more moving, more empowering feeling within you, and repeat the steps.
If you know of any other ways of accessing your optimum state, please share.:)
Join our LinkedIn ICF Coach Mentors and Mentees Group for exciting discussions about coaching & training techniques.
Copyright © 2012 by Marianna Lead & www.GoalImageryInstitute.com All Rights Reserved in All Media.
Ways of Teaching: Rules or Anarchy?
When people register for trainings -whether it’s hypnotherapy, coaching or any other modality – they expect a solid set of rules they can follow. I always believed that rules are the spine of any teaching. However, as important as they are, we should be allowed to swerve from the rules upon our judgment. Especially in trainings that are not based on strictly analytical thinking and math, feeling that you can be innovative and creative is a necessary ingredient and one of the rules in itself. As Carl Jung once put it, “It’s almost a rule that I don’t want to make too many rules.”
From the very beginning, from the very first class – no matter what training you are signing up with me for – I tell my students that we must be flexible to some degree about applying the rules and that rules are created for our benefit. I warn against putting yourself in a proverbial practitioner’s prison of rules to follow. Go ahead and change them! My only request, if you want to change a rule, do it consciously and be able to explain your rational behind it. This way, we are not encouraging anarchy, but we are encouraging independent thinking, imagination, and creativity. All of which may contribute to creating a new rule or maybe even a new theory! Most important, it warrants great learning.
Join our LinkedIn ICF Coach Mentors and Mentees Group for exciting discussions about coaching & training techniques.
Copyright © 2012 by Marianna Lead & www.GoalImageryInstitute.com All Rights Reserved in All Media.
Does Universe Mirror Your Challenges in Clients Who Hire You?
This keeps happening to me over and over again… As soon as I got back to work after a really bad car accident about 20 years ago, my first client was someone who wanted to overcome their fear of driving via hypnosis. Was that ironic or what? And now, here we go again. As I’m trying to get fit for this summer, a woman hired me to hypnotize her to lose weight. I see the same pattern with my coaching clients and students. When I supervise my students coaching each other in my coach training and coach mentoring classes, over and over we encounter this weird phenomena. When someone has doubts on how to build their coaching business, they are asked to coach someone with this exact dilemma. When someone wants to become more assertive, they attract a client who wants to work on being more assertive as well. And so on… Do you have similar experiences? What do you think causes this to happen? Is this the Law of Attraction at work, a simple coincidence, or something else?
© 2012 by Marianna Lead & www.GoalImageryInstitute.com All Rights Reserved in All Media.